The past couple of days have been really hard. It all started by looking at my bathroom doors, the veneer is coming off the wood slightly. Then I remembered how mummy talked about me and her going door shopping and she would treat me to new doors. My heart sank. Not due to the new doors. I couldn’t give a shit about new doors. It made me think about all the plans we made. We were planning to go to New York, in fact we talked about it every year and always thought, we can do it next year. Unfortunately their is no next year now.
I’m sad, I’m angry, I’m numb. I know this feeling will pass but the past couple of days have been hard. They say lie is cruel, well I know where that statement comes from now. I know I’m being very selfish and self centred right now, I am conscious I have said I about thirty times in todays blog. I just cant help it! I just want to go somewhere and scream at something. I want to punch something! I want everyone to feel a piece of what I’m feeling as the burden of these feelings are weighing me down. I feel like I’m deep-sea diving and I’ve ran out of oxygen in my tank. Maybe tomorrow will bring a better day. Until then I shall get into bed, put on some trashy television and try to escape for an hour or two before I go to sleep.
arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Night night x
A Grievers Guide to the Galaxy 