Day 78: Dazzles Blog

There is many a time me and Michael have ventured out to show off our newly dyed hair (*shudders*), our glowing fake tans (Michael more so than me 😉), or our matching outfits. These outfits were never planned, but I’ve lost count of the times we’ve been compared to Ant n Dec or fecking Diva Fever from the X Factor.

The nights would consist of either catching the last train to Belfast with more vodka than was required for a 40minute trip, or a trip into the wee town we grew up in to visit the same bars in the same order. A bit like we do in Canal Street now actually. I guess it was just practice for the bigger, badder, glittery and later things to come in Manchester.

More so than not, we would have midweek drinks at Michaels house. No real reason, we just could. So we did.

Mrs McCarney would often join us for a little glass of red (her drink of choice) and some gossiping and then would leave us to it when certain music/movie would go on. She would give us both a kiss on the cheek, would tell me it was lovely to see me and that she would no doubt see me in the morning, and then would climb the stairs to bed.

Now, anyone that knows me, knows my drink of choice is cider and blackcurrant. It’s quick and easy and everywhere does it. Anyone that knows me also knows I have an extremely small bladder. So the two don’t really mix well, meaning I need to pee A LOT.

This is usually fine, but when you’re in someone else’s house and your best friends Mam is sleeping upstairs, it can sometimes feel like the Crystal Maze getting to the bathroom without putting on the ‘big light’ and making too much noise. Mrs McCarney was the lady of the house after all.

Of course over time I did manage to find my tipsy way through the dark house without hassle. However, the one spot I always failed on was the 4th stair from the top. You could have looked at it and it would have let out this almighty squeak! So of course I always crapped myself because it was so loud in fear of waking up Mrs McCarney.

Now every time this happened I could always hear a faint but very firm “….Michael….” coming out from one of the rooms. Just think Miranda Priestly calling out to Andrea. This would happen several times throughout the evening (small bladder remember) and I never answered back. I scuttled off to the bright lights of the living room.

Mrs McCarney would sometimes leave me down the road to mine again in the morning, where we would have more of a chat about stuff. It was only ever a short 5minute drive but as soon as that car door was closed I got asked the same question “Well did you boys have fun?” Which I quickly answered with “Sorry if we were too loud!”.

There was always a slight smile when she responded with “I didn’t hear a thing, not a peep out of you. As long as you had fun”.

This was obviously a downright lie as she had always always always heard me squeak on the stairs, but it always put my mind at rest knowing that she wasn’t annoyed.

Thinking about it now over the last few weeks, she probably got as little sleep as we did but sat up enjoying the laughter from her son in the room below. Whenever Mrs McCarney heard that squeak and called out to Michael, it wasn’t to tell him to turn Hairspray down and it was time for me to go home, it was really just to see if her wee boy was OK. She knew he was safe in his own home having a bit of giggle with a pal, but still wanted to check in on him. She loved her little boy and it always showed.

I can’t drink red wine, but cider and blackcurrant is as close a colour to it, so the next time Michael wants to raise a wee glass to his Mam, I’ll make sure my drink of choice is in a wine glass.

*squeak*